"A Journey Through Time: Childhood Dreams, Family Bonds, and the Emotional Weight of Growing Up."

 "A Journey Through Time: Childhood Dreams, Family Bonds, and the Emotional Weight of Growing Up."

Today, I watched a Tamil movie called Satyam Sundaram with my partner, and it deeply resonated with me on a personal level. There were three key moments in the film that took me back to my childhood, and I’d like to share one of them with you.

In the movie, there’s a man who returns to his village after 22 years for his sister's wedding. His family had been forced to leave their home, as it had been taken over by someone else. The man's deepest desire is to buy a house, and that theme really struck a chord with me because it reminded me of my own family's journey.

In my childhood, our biggest dream was also to own a house. My father had to leave his studies because he couldn’t manage English, having studied in Telugu medium until his intermediate level. My grandfather had sent him to Bangalore for university, but he struggled, failed, and returned home. Afterward, my father got married to my mother, who was just 18 at the time and had dropped out of school due to health issues. After the wedding, with no support or resources, they were sent away from home.

They moved to the city with nothing but hopes. Two years into their marriage, my brother was born, and two years later, I came along. At that point, my father still didn’t have a stable job. He eventually started a business, but the journey was never easy. Before I could fully grasp our situation, we had moved from place to place—first living on the terrace of a four-story building in a single room, which was especially harsh during the rainy season. Then we moved to a two-room house, and after that, to several other places.

In 2020, we faced a significant setback. My father’s business took a major hit, and we lost the only property we owned—a plot that my brother and I had dreamed of turning into our own house. Both of us studied civil engineering with that dream in mind, but unfortunately, we lost the plot. With whatever little we had left, we bought an apartment.

Finally, in November 2021, we moved into our new apartment. The feeling of having our own home was indescribable. I poured my heart into decorating every corner of that house, cherishing every wall and space. It was a dream come true.

In 2024, after I got married, I had to leave that house when moving to the UK. The night before I left, I walked through every room, touching the walls, feeling the weight of the memories. I couldn’t sleep that night—my heart felt so heavy leaving the home that had meant everything to us.

The feeling of owning a house is a dream for many. Some are fortunate enough to achieve it, while others face incredible struggles and may not succeed, but that doesn't mean they’ve failed. This theme from Satyam Sundaram really touched me on a deep level.

The second moment in the movie that brought back memories was when the main character attends his sister’s wedding and gifts her jewelry. On stage, she opens it and lovingly asks him to help her put it on. This scene reminded me of my brother.

When I first came to the UK, my brother bought me a pair of Nike shoes. I didn’t know how to tie them properly. Every time I visited his home, he’d check my shoes, notice they weren’t tied right, and say, "Pooja, this isn’t how you tie them." He’d kneel down and patiently show me again how to do it. That simple act brought tears to my eyes because it showed how much he cared for me, just like in the movie.

The third thing that struck me was about owning a cycle. For many of us, having our own cycle as kids was a dream. Despite the ups and downs in my life, my parents always tried to fulfill my wishes, no matter how small. I remember riding my first cycle in the 4th standard. My father added two extra tires until I learned to balance it properly. My brother helped teach me, and though I fell many times, I was determined. Finally, the day came when I could ride my cycle to school by myself.

However, when I did, my friends' parents weren’t happy. They came to my mother, complaining, “You’ve given her a cycle at such a young age, and now all our kids want one too.” I was scared I might lose my cycle, but my mother stood by me. She supported me, and that encouragement gave me so much confidence as a child.

Growing up, my father often had to travel for business, so it was up to me to get to school on my own. My mother supported me and gave me a cycle, which became my lifeline for independence. Later, when I was in the 8th standard, I remember getting a Lady Bird cycle. I’d ride it to school with my friends, and thinking back to those memories while watching the movie brought a beautiful smile to my face.

But now, as an adult, I sometimes struggle with the reality of growing up. There's a part of me that hates it—I miss the simplicity and innocence of childhood. But, like it or not, I have to accept the truth that life moves on, no matter how much we wish to hold onto those carefree days.

If you get a chance to watch the movie Satyam Sundaram, I’d love to hear your thoughts and how it made you feel. Please share your feelings in the comments!

Pooja Mattapalli